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Information Something to consider. (1 Viewer)

potato

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That's what it was. I kind of explained earlier that I didn't realize the impact of my words or the influence of them because I also never thought about "What if ___________ read my words?" That was something that never came to my mind until I reflected later on. Although I kept everything I had to say and that behavior strictly on my SNS account, it was still very negative, their fans read it and I know I hurt people because they read those words and expressed their anger at me and then it was a cycling of arguing and me trying to justify why I thought that way or said what I said, while they would justify why it was wrong. Pointless arguments and fanwars. It always hurts when someone you are a fan of and idolize is being talked about negatively so I understand where they were coming from. I just wish that I would have minded my business at the time and reminded myself of the saying "If you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all." because I probably would have thought before doing so. I really was too into my own bubble of negativity to consider the impact I had or could have but I am glad I realized it and changed although I wish it was sooner.

I, too, hope that I can stay far away from that bubble negativity and I hope I can steer others away from it as well and thank you for sharing a bit of your experience with me. It's good that you realized that you had people who supported you and you overcame it. I have people by my side and they always encourage me to look forward, to let the past serve as a reminder to continue to be better but to not let the past control me; I think that's what my issue is. I keep letting that feeling of guilt and disappointment linger and I feel like I don't deserve anyone's encouragement or kind words because I remember how I once was and it just leads to negative thoughts and ruminating... I will try my best to change that though. It's hard but I will take it step by step.
Let's do it together. We can overcome anything if we put our minds to it. Good luck! <3 :nekolove:
 

Mayday

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I'm glad to hear that you were also able to overcome your situation and become a better person. That is what matters and I thank you for your kind words and encouragement. ❤
Yeah, I was only 10/11 back then (5th grade) so it was quite a while ago. We all do dumb things when we're young. And regardless of our age, the older you get, the more you should learn and improve as a person. It's really nice to see someone improve the way you have. No problem~
 
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The only reason I have to negatively judge you so far is liking Sunny Summer :taesip: this thread didn't give me a reason to judge you that way and it doesn't seem like it did anyone else either, so try to take it easy and enjoy being here, this is a place for positive and mature discussions and you help build that too.
Sunny Summer is my jam; it gives me positive vibes, I love summer, I love sunny days, I love GFRIEND - What is there not to like?! But I do understand that we all have our preferences (And thank you for making me laugh by bringing up Sunny Summer. I needed that.)

But maybe I'm overthinking it. I just have a feeling that someone will be thinking in their head if I post in the future, "Oh, there goes that person that was a former anti and talked about growing from it but what they did was still horrible!" and I just keep thinking of all kinds of nonsense scenarios of people being disappointed in me but this is a place for mature discussions, I keep forgetting that due to the SNS site that I was on because there was a lack of that and it's just constant arguments, fanwars, fighting fire with fire, etc.

I wanted to reveal who that K-POP artist was but I have a feeling that if people found out, there definitely would be negative judgment and backlash because that artist has gone through their own hard times and they have a huge fandom, almost everyone loves their songs but they've been judged harshly: One of those times was before I became negative toward them, I was a former fan of the group and everyone in the group, and I never judged them for that situation but there was a second situation that occurred with them which changed my entire perception of them and made me have ill feelings because of the things I read, heard and believed in... and the rest is history, which I explained above but I do regret it and although I still have my opinions about the situation that occurred, which they unfairly shouldered a lot of the blame for because people pointed fingers at them (And I didn't help because I mainly blamed them too, that's what I meant when I said that I would be part of the group to blame if something ever happens to that artist) However, I realized that I needed to let that anger toward them go, that I didn't have all of the facts of the situation despite having my own theories and beliefs but despite how I was, I really want that artist to get through their hard times because I know they still go through them, I want them to live their life as happily and contented as they have been these days, I hope they continue to have all the success and love that they get because they do deserve it and I feel bad for judging them as harshly as I did. I feel bad for being part of the group that should have understood them instead of blaming them. I will always feel bad for my behavior toward them so I just genuinely hope that they stay healthy, happy, and continue making their fans happy.
 
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Yeah, I was only 10/11 back then (5th grade) so it was quite a while ago. We all do dumb things when we're young. And regardless of our age, the older you get, the more you should learn and improve as a person. It's really nice to see someone improve the way you have. No problem~
In your defense, you were very young. I was 18/19 at the time so I should have known better, to some people 18/19 is still considered young but it's old enough to know better than to be negative toward others but like you said, regardless of our age, we learn and improve and that's what is most important.
 

Mayday

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In your defense, you were very young. I was 18/19 at the time so I should have known better, to some people 18/19 is still considered young but it's old enough to know better than to be negative toward others but like you said, regardless of our age, we learn and improve and that's what is most important.
That's true, but like you did state, there's always room for improvement. Once you've overcome that (which you seem to have done very well), there's only going up from there. And it isn't easy to do. Honestly, I applaud you. Changing at that age must be rather difficult.
 
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That's true, but like you did state, there's always room for improvement. Once you've overcome that (which you seem to have done very well), there's only going up from there. And it isn't easy to do. Honestly, I applaud you. Changing at that age must be rather difficult.
It's not easy but it's worth it because I would rather continue growing as a person than stay back in that bubble of negativity that had nothing to offer but... negativity! I'm still on the younger side, in my early 20's so I'm sure there will be minor mistakes in life that I make along the way and will have to learn from but since I've reflected and changed, I'm certain I will never go back to that bubble of negativity. I really have learned my lesson, it's just that I will always feel bad and guilty for being like that but maybe those feelings will simmer down although I will always let my past serve as a reminder to be a better person. ^^
 

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Sunny Summer is my jam; it gives me positive vibes, I love summer, I love sunny days, I love GFRIEND - What is there not to like?! But I do understand that we all have our preferences (And thank you for making me laugh by bringing up Sunny Summer. I needed that.)

But maybe I'm overthinking it. I just have a feeling that someone will be thinking in their head if I post in the future, "Oh, there goes that person that was a former anti and talked about growing from it but what they did was still horrible!" and I just keep thinking of all kinds of nonsense scenarios of people being disappointed in me but this is a place for mature discussions, I keep forgetting that due to the SNS site that I was on because there was a lack of that and it's just constant arguments, fanwars, fighting fire with fire, etc.

I wanted to reveal who that K-POP artist was but I have a feeling that if people found out, there definitely would be negative judgment and backlash because that artist has gone through their own hard times and they have a huge fandom, almost everyone loves their songs but they've been judged harshly: One of those times was before I became negative toward them, I was a former fan of the group and everyone in the group, and I never judged them for that situation but there was a second situation that occurred with them which changed my entire perception of them and made me have ill feelings because of the things I read, heard and believed in... and the rest is history, which I explained above but I do regret it and although I still have my opinions about the situation that occurred, which they unfairly shouldered a lot of the blame for because people pointed fingers at them (And I didn't help because I mainly blamed them too, that's what I meant when I said that I would be part of the group to blame if something ever happens to that artist) However, I realized that I needed to let that anger toward them go, that I didn't have all of the facts of the situation despite having my own theories and beliefs but despite how I was, I really want that artist to get through their hard times because I know they still go through them, I want them to live their life as happily and contented as they have been these days, I hope they continue to have all the success and love that they get because they do deserve it and I feel bad for judging them as harshly as I did. I feel bad for being part of the group that should have understood them instead of blaming them. I will always feel bad for my behavior toward them so I just genuinely hope that they stay healthy, happy, and continue making their fans happy.
Even if that did happen, that situation would tell more about that person then it would about you and as for the group well I have an idea who you are on about and and sometimes when you're a fan of a group it can be hard to know what to do with controversies like Seungris case, 4Minutes disbandment, Jessica being kicked, T-aras bullying scandal, etc.

It's a big decision to make when you're facing that and sometimes it can take a while for fans to come around.
 
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Even if that did happen, that situation would tell more about that person then it would about you and as for the group well I have an idea who you are on about and and sometimes when you're a fan of a group it can be hard to know what to do with controversies like Seungris case, 4Minutes disbandment, Jessica being kicked, T-aras bullying scandal, etc.

It's a big decision to make when you're facing that and sometimes it can take a while for fans to come around.
You're right and because it is/was a situation where things are still unclear and all people have is rumors to go based off of to provide insight, of course blindly trusting in rumors isn't good but it's hard when you have rumors supporting one side and rumors supporting the other and fandom wars involved and it was just chaotic back when that issue happened and I leaned towards the rumors and side that supported what I thought had happened and believed happened but I shouldn't have gotten involved in fighting fire with fire years ago but I did learn from it. I hope that one day everything can be cleared up with that situation and I won't be mad if my theories were wrong all along, I would accept that and wish all parties involved well in life because that's all I can do and that's what they deserve.
 
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Thank you for this inspiring post. It’s just a good reminder that the toxicity in Kpop fandoms can hurt everyone including the persons who spread it. You learnt from your mistake and made up for them as you could. You really changed and this is the most important thing, don’t be too harsh non yourself please. You seem to be a wonderful person now. I wish you to be happy. :nekolove:
 
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Thank you for this inspiring post. It’s just a good reminder that the toxicity in Kpop fandoms can hurt everyone including the persons who spread it. You learnt from your mistake and made up for them as you could. You really changed and this is the most important thing, don’t be too harsh non yourself please. You seem to be a wonderful person now. I wish you to be happy. :nekolove:
Thank you! I'm glad that I pushed myself to post it because I thought it was something that needed to be talked about and considered because people are always engaging in fanwars and/or carelessly saying hurtful words and behaving in a toxic manner. I just hope that there's something to take away from this post and to keep in mind. Thank you, you're very kind and I appreciate your words. Maybe one day I won't be as hard on myself about it but I know that if something ever happens to that artist, I'm going to feel horrible because they didn't deserve all that negativity and I corrected my behavior and changed after the damage was already done. I wish I would have realized it sooner but unfortunately, I didn't. So, I will always let this serve as a reminder for myself to think before speaking and to be kinder to others. ❤
 

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